for my beloved

i love you and i honestly do... 

i think you know who you are..

this is for you...

to the man i married

You are my earth and all that earth implies
The gravity that ballasts me in space,
the air I breathe, the land that stills my cries
For food & shelter against devouring days
and sets my north & south, east & west,
You are my final elemental clay
The driven heart must turn to for its rest

If in your arms that hold me now so near
I lift my keening thoughts to Helicon
As trees rooted to the earth uprear
Their quickening leaves & flowers to the sun
You who are earth. O never doubt that I
Need you no less because I need the sky

_____________________________________

Another hopeless romantic poetry like Browning's.  What passion has driven the persona to write such poetry of love?  The first line typically suggests that the protagonist is the earth of the persona?  What is meant by this? Literally, it just means that the persona can never live nor breathe without the protagonist. The gravity that ballasts me into space suggests that the protagonist is the persona's balancer, without the protagonist then the persona would be lost.  For food and shelter against devouring days is poetically spoken and would be tantamount to "when we're hungry, love will keep us alive". And sets my north & south, east & west, what else could be stated that the persona's life evolves around the protagonist.

Helicon, I guess refers to Mount Helicon in Boeotia, Greece.  It can be further analyzed into two.  Helicon, is the mountain of the Muses where reside which can lead to the last line where the persona said, need you no less because I need the sky.  Muses are living near the gods back in ancient mythology wherein the gods live in the sky.  Furthermore, Helicon can be referred to as the sky and/or gods and basically, the persona worships the protagonist in the poem just like the Greeks worshipped the gods and goddesses and muses back then.

the time traveller's wife

I have watched this movie just last saturday and I just can't help but be emphatic and melodramatic for the protagonists in the movie.  It seems like their lives are boxed in what if and hoping that the time travelling stops and they could just live their normal, happy and simple lives. The story is not your typical  happily ever after movie but it captivates the attention, mind and passion of the movie goers...

A suggested movie! Rating it a little over 9. (o'_'o)

my bestfriend's wedding

I have a favor to ask, I'm hoping it's not too much.  After all, you said you'd always be there for me, so, here it goes. Don't like her. Don't pick her. Anyone but HER.  it hurts me too much.  And if I could possibly fit one more thing in there if it is okay with you, maybe, just maybe, do think you could fall for me?

Analysis of Elizabeth Barrett Browning's Sonnets from the Portuguese, Sonnet 43

Sonnet XLIII

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

My soul can reach, when feeling out sight

For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of everyday's

Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light

I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;

I love thee with the passion put to use

In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

With my lost saints, - - I love thee with the breath,

Smiles, tears, of all my life - - and, if God choose,

I shall but love thee better after death.

___________________________________________________

Sonnet 43 is in iambic pentameter.  Iambic Pentameter is popularized by the Italian model of Petrarch(1304-1374) and by the English model of Shakespeare (1564-1616).  A rhyme scheme of ABBA, ABBA (lines 1 to 8) and CD (lines 9 to 14) was used, having ten syllable per with five pairs of unstressed and stressed syllables.  

Sonnet 43 is the second to the last Sonnet and the most popular among the sonnets Browning wrote.  Then again, the sonnet deeply expresses Browning's love for Robert Browning.  First and second line especially refers to the protagonist of the sonnet, being referred to by the persona as Thee.  The third and fourth line refers to the spiritual realm of the soul in reaching the goal of living. In the fifth and sixth line of the sonnet, she states that her love for Robert Browning meets her everyday's need.  It can be noticed that the word need was used instead of the word want.  Basically, it characterizes the persona's unyielding love and it expresses the inevitability of Robert in the persona's life.  The seventh to the eleventh lines of the sonnet seems to deal with the purity and freedom of choice of the persona in loving the protagonist.  It refers to the intensity of love which can be equaled to either suffering and mourning.  It also refers to the purity and simplicity of a child's love with fervor to the saints.  Lastly, twelfth to the fourteenth lines of the sonnet refers to the undying, unyielding, eternal and unending love of the persona to the protagonist.

almost lover

forgive me love (repost)

I, went to your house
Walked up the stairs
Opened the door without ringing the bell
Walked down the hall
Into your room
Where I could smell you

And I, I shouldn't be here
Without permission
I shouldn't be here?

Would you forgive me love?
If I dance in your shower
Would you forgive me love?
If I laid in your bed
Would you forgive me love?
If I stayed all afternoon oh

I took off my clothes
Put on your robe
Went through your drawers
And I found your cologne
Went down to the den
Found your cds
And I played your Joni
And I shouldn't stay long
You might be home soon
I shouldn't stay long

Would you forgive me love?
If I dance in your shower
Would you forgive me love?
If I laid in your bed
Would you forgive me love?
If I stayed all afternoon

I burned your incense
I ran a bath
I notice a letter that sat on your desk
It said hello love
I love you so love
Meet me at midnight
And no, it wasn't my writing,
I better go soon
It wasn't my writing

So forgive me love
If I cry in your shower
So forgive me love
For the salt in your bed
So forgive me love
If I cry all afternoon oh

Song

Love me with your whole heart
or give me no love to me,
Half-love is a poor thing,
Neither Bond nor free
you must love me gladly
soul & body too,
or else find a new love,
and good-by to you

acceptance

 

Pain in relationships can either be categorized into letting go or moving on.  Letting go is sacrificing what was rightfully yours while moving on is forgetting what was never even yours to begin with.

But both prospects involve accepting in order to heal. Accepting that the person can never be yours or never will be yours again is the first step.

Acceptance is the hardest part especially when our emotions get the better of us.  It is like holding on to something which pains you – it is like struggling in the middle of the ocean wanting to live, wanting to be saved but the other person is at the shore just watching us drown.  It is like gripping onto the thorny rose knowing that we are bleeding but we still hold onto it believing that we would get the sweetest smell out of it.  But the irony of it is that no matter how much we want, no matter how much we need, no matter how much we desire, and no matter how much we love, we end up getting hurt and alone.

Maybe we did something wrong.  Maybe we were just meant to be taught a lesson but every pain that lurks in our hearts we wished that broken hearts can be mended by band aids like skinned knees.  But maybe just maybe we are still hoping that in the end they can be ours.  Sadly, no matter how we wish for our fairy tale ending it will never happen.

After few quiet moments, after a few “me” times, we get to the point of realization that what we want will sometimes not be ours so it’s best to let things go because they are not ours and are not meant to be in our lives.  Some are just passing by, some are just teaching us lessons, some are just stopping for a moment or two but no matter what their purpose in our life is, it is better to accept that there are instances in our lives that we have to let go or move on. 

Time heals all wounds, so they say, but accepting what has happened to our lives is one thing we should learn to do whether you loved deeply or got hurt badly, once in our lives we are hurt, once in our lives we are bruised but no matter how bruised or hurt we are in the end we get to stand up and live again and love again.

i hate her...

I hate her when she says she loves me

i hate her when i feel the warmth of her touch during cold nights

i hate her cause i still feel her kisses and caress when sunset comes

i hate her cause she has given me the strength to endure all odds

i hate her coz she taught me how to love

i hate her coz she showed me the true meaning of love

i hate her when she pushes me away when in fact she wants me to be there

i hate her when she makes me cry

i hate her when she accepted me for who i am

i hate her when she cries because she makes me want to hug her just tight

i hate her coz she's leaving me without even saying goodbye

i hate her when she makes me laugh when im down

i hate her coz we've shared lots of ups & downs

i hate her when she pouts her lips because it softens me

i hate her when she wants an ice cream during stormy days

i hate her coz she taught me how to love & treasure her

i hate her when i asks her to stay but she wouldn't listen

i hate her when she has tantrums that drive me crazy

i hate her sweetness on hot summer afternoons

i hate her when she calls me at 3am that makes me sleepless the whole day

i hate her coz she's my life

these are the things i hate about her which just makes me love her more.

on moving on and letting go...

you can only love someone if you love yourself completely
and you have so much love to give..

you should never tell yourself
i'll stop loving him if i'm loving someone new
but instead
tell yourself
i'll stop loving him because i'm starting to love myself first..

CONTRADICTION

I thought that....

I'll never admire you
but my eyes keep on staring at you...

I'll never care for you
but I can't control myself not to worry about you...

I'll never think of you
but I keep on looking for you...

I'll never fall for you
but my heart shouts I'm missing you...

I'll never need you
but my days will not be complete without you

but most of all
I'll never love you
well in fact it's obvious...


... I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT YOU...

** this post is located at my drafts folder and was originally written on 25 August 2009, 5:34PM so I decided to just post it.  What the heck, I don't even remember my inspiration for this one **